it's beginning to look a lot like...Audition Season

Whew! This week has worn me out and it's only the beginning of audition season! Between working, auditioning, and taking lessons, I feel like I have no time to just sit on the couch and watch the Hills...but I guess that's not why I moved to NYC!

Just to give you a little taste of an average day: The night before, I get home from work around 1:30am or 2am and I wake up probably around 7am (that's way later than some of my friends, they get up at 4:45... I don't have their stamina!) and go sign up at the auditions I'm going to that day. I am non-equity so I sign up on the Non-Equity list. Then there is the Equity Member Candidate list, and then the Equity Alternate list, and then the ACTUAL LIST of Equity people. So as you can see, my list is last priority and it's usually a miracle if they get to the non-equity list.

Although I am so thankful that I've been able to sing for some big shows, when they cut it down to only singing 8 bars, it's not very rewarding. It's been frustrating to want to feel like a performer, but to never get to perform.

But, I'm not discouraged yet- give me a few more weeks :)

Romans 8 says, "Live under the control of the Holy Spirit. If you do, you will think about what the spirit wants...the mind controlled by the Spirit brings life and peace."

I am reminding myself constantly that my life is not my own. I was not created to worship myself and live in a self-centered world, I was created to worship God. So in the grand scheme of things...auditions don't matter. What matters is that I am honoring God and worshipping Him through the gifts that He's given me. It's hard to see this when everyone seems to be only living for their career...but it's a breath of fresh air to step back and realize that life is so much bigger than that crammed holding room.